# Esmerelda had a plan

I’ve written another song.

 

 

Esmerelda had a plan

Esmerelda had a plan
Every time she wed a man

She started out when she was twenty
And tied the knot with one who’d plenty
’twas in a bank, so hard he’d slave!
Just begging for his early grave!
In life he’d shown financial merit
And the whole darn lot did she inherit

Oh Esmerelda had a plan
Every time she wed a man

The merry widow, not short of a bob
Chose husband two with a different job
With clowns and a band and acrobats
And someone skilled to train big cats
Ringmaster was his job, you see
And she got in to watch the circus free.

Oh Esmerelda had a plan
Every time she wed a man

But he was a drinker, with a roving eye,
So she divorced him by and by
Eternity then got to her head
Where would she go, when she was dead?
She met a preacher who confidently said
He knew the big answers, and soon they were wed.

Oh Esmerelda had a plan
Every time she wed a man

She buried the preacher, and felt her age
And hatched a good plan for the final stage
A funeral director offered his hand
And this was exactly what she’d planned
That’s when I met her, on husband four
Past best-before date, in fact at death’s door.

Oh Esmerelda had a plan
Every time she wed a man

So I asked Esmerelda, what was her plan?
What had she got from marrying each man?
The banker, the circus man, preacher and then
The undertaker – all four men.
She paused before answering (though not for long)
And then gave her answer, delivered in song.

I’m Esmerelda. I had a plan
Every time I wed a man
One for the money,
Two for the show,
Three to get ready
And four to go.

 

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1 Comment

Filed under General chit-chat, Satire and humour, Songs and poems

One response to “# Esmerelda had a plan

  1. Very cute, and the clever ending made me chuckle…

    Also, Esmeralda’s (all too common…) and cynical take on marriage, reminded me of the oft repeated anecdote concerning the glamorous actress Zsa Zsa Gabor, who claimed that whenever she was asked to declare her occupation on any official form, she wrote down “Housekeeper” and unashamedly explained that the reason was, “Each time I get divorced, I keep the house Darling…”

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